Monday, October 27, 2008

MR. STEFON BIRTHDAY

Yes sir, Mr. Stefon is 10 years old!!!!




Here he is as a drummer 2 years ago and this summer with the Hulk. Mr. Conservative is serious about the pictures not being on the net, I will discuss that tomorrow.

This morning I told him Happy Birthday and he said Thank you. I was shocked, no extra talking. So, I asked Anger Mgmt did you tell your brother Happy Bday and she said, yeah, I been told him, he said, FINALLY, dang. I said, okay sounds bout right. I told Mr. Stefon, usually you walk around the house screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY, SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME' (he does this BEFORE you have a chance to say it) He said, I am too old for that, that was so last year mommy. Um, kay.

I would not trade my baby in for anything....................................or would I?.......I kid, I kid!!

Sorry for everything being quick and jumbled up, wanted to post about his bday, I'm out grammatical errors and all. (the usual)

Friday, October 24, 2008

You betta WORK!!

DAYHUM!!!!!



Just wow. Freak what you heard he is rocking whatever the hell he is working that retarded ass song. Just wow. No damn words...........except...........um...........when does class start? I mean I think I would lose at least 20lbs and a couple inches.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Remy is good for your body

Hey,

I had class tonight and my husband picked me up and made me a drink and I am feeling good as hell right now!!! The kids are sleep and we are watching the slow as debate where McCain might sell a kid or something to get into office. Oh my Remy VSOP is the bomb!!! I am suppose to be studying for my exam but um, that is not going to happen. I spoke to my bestest girlfriend and I cursed her out and we laughed - typical me. The best thing I love about her - she is not only beautiful on the outside she is so genuine on the inside. She is one of those people that always see the positive side - as we all know I am not, I see ALL sides damn it. Anywho, back to the debate and me seducing the husband.

I hollah!!

Let them fight!!! Lace up your boots!!!

Why won’t they just give them gloves and let them fight. McCain look seriously mad and Obama got that laugh like whatever, you don’t know me for real.

McCain look seriously desperate. He is grasping at straws. OMG this is so funny.

Oh and who the hell is Joe. Senator Obama, do you know Joe. Man get the fuck out of here. He is Joe got darn it.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

My best friend is gone!

I am really, seriously, sad right now. I am writing this post through some crocodile tears. As, I previously stated in my quickie post that my bestest girlfriend in the Whole Wide World has moved. She called me today and told me she moved to Wilson, North Carolina. Ya’ll I know she had to do it because she was being harassed and stalked and she needed to do it for her and her children (my god babies) safety, but still.

We have been friends since we were 13 years old. I moved to the neighborhood and to a new middle school and I remember this girl with this twang in my French class and I use to tease the hell out of her (yes, I did be quiet).

She has two gorgeous little girls (and I am not saying that because I am their god mommy) and the last ones father is a BIG asshole. He has always been hateful and from the first time I met him I told her AND him that I HATE him. He has done so many hateful things, so I will just tell you a little.

  1. He told her when they were out that her daughter; a 4 year old at the time was a snob. I told her to kick his old ass to the curb he was in his 40’s (I know he is not old, but I am saying).
  2. Another time when she was pregnant with his child, he threw her across a table.
  3. Another time when it was the coldest day of the winter 3 years ago and his daughter was a month old he threw her, the baby and her daughter out of the house with socks and t-shirt on. How do I know? She called me from a neighbor house. I know he is not the only one at fault she should have left. I told her when she called to please go home (she had her own place still – another story), or come to my house and stay. She said she would and she did not.
  4. She has also caught his fat ass cheating more then once- the internet, and more.

Oh and the killah, she is drop dead gorgeous, and very intelligent (well questionable now, do not judge me) and he is a hood rat and ain’t cute (everyone who meets them wants to know what are they doing together). He chased her for three years and she told him no, finally she said okay and this is what she gets for it. Ugh, you would think with all that chasing he would put her on a pedestal, but um no.

Well, he does not want to pay for child support so he is always trying to find away out, want to file for custody and all types of shit and he has tried this so many times. Last time he filed her for his taxes and he was not allowed to, he just called her AFTER doing it, talking about, I know your going to be mad, but I thought it was only fair. WTF!!! I mean how fast can you dial the IRS….ssssssshhhhhhhiiiiiiitttt!!

Well, he is now taking her BACK to court again. The reason, he does not want to pay child support, he is so sickening, and by the way, this is his only child. Old men are just as bad as young men. He went to her church (were her father is a reverend) acting a full, her job acting like a fool (did I tell you she works for child support enforcement - yup), he showed his ass and they called people on her.

So, her mom and dad pick their child up from the daycare and watch her until she comes and get her. She pulls up in front of her mom and dad house and she sees this car racing up to her car. Of course it is him, she believes his next door neighbor in his car, and he says to the guy throw that shit at the bitch (subpoena). She did not say anything to him, she just continued getting her daughter out of the car (yes the muthafucker did it in front of her). The guy gets out of the car and throws it at her, she looked at it and kept walking. He starts saying how he should kill her and that he hates her and this bull crap and she took it very seriously – which she should. She filed a protective order and while completed it, a domestic.abuse organization got involved and helped her be very detailed and specific which went from a protective order to harassment. But she still did not feel safe, so she got out of dodge and I told her I understood. I did/do, but I can’t help but be selfish.

Remembering the time, when she taught me how to drive in her brand new car and not caring that it was new. Falling asleep while we were on the highway from B’more to D.C. or better yet driving to North Carolina and me waking her up telling her I don’t want to drive because it was raining and she told me to man up (ya’ll know I don’t drive, but I did with her). OOOh Lord, the time we went to Tyson Corner and the car was tied down with a hanger or something and the hood came up while we were driving on the highway - dying, her father and my husband wanted to kill us, we did not care, we were going to Nordstorm and needed to get there. Being there threw each one of my kids birth and me for her. Throwing her a baby shower for her first daughter who was suppose to be a boy so we did the whole damn thing BLUE - oh my. Remembering, when we rode on the back of bikes (ssshhhh!!!!, um a little someone don’t know) to East Carolina University with my clear high heels (couldn’t tell me nothing) and partying. This post did make me laugh a little, I think I will call her. Have you spoken to one of your good girl/guy friend in awhile? Thank God I have other good friends in the city.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Did you know Mr. Stefon was a barber?

This one is for Patrice. Earlier in the week she commented on how cute Mr. Stefon was and all that good stuff. He does stuff and because of his cuteness, people always say, "give him another chance" well, here is the story I have been meaning to post about good ole Mr. Stefon. It's long but well worth it.

Imagine….

One of the hottest days of the summer. The weather man said it was going to be 97 or 98 and the humidity will make it feel more like 110 and its already 82 degrees at 7:00 in the morning.

Imagine….

You wake your child up for tennis camp (indoors/outdoors so he will not be in the sun) and say, “come on get ready” and you go take care of business, so you look, so fresh and so clean even though your hair is going to fall, but as Snoop says, "ya got ta do it." (I know that's right)

Imagine…..

You finish and you see your son MR. STEFON WITH A HOODIE ON and it is zipped ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP.

WTF, no imagine, what the hell going on!!! It’s already hot in the damn house. Anger Mgmt of course is sitting ringside.

Me: Um, why do you have that hoodie on its going to be VERY hot today, take that off.
Mr. Stefon: I want to wear it.
Me: Why? It’s too hot.
Mr. Stefon: I want to wear it for fashion. (yes this is what he said, I wish I was making this up)
Me: (thinking maybe its cold in the building so, okay (sucker)) For fashion? (Anger Mgmt is laughing) Whatever, but your not walking down the street with me, with that damn hoodie on its already 82 degrees.
Me: Take the damn hoodie off.
Mr. Stefon: Okay (starts walking fast as shit)
Me: You need to brush your hair.
Mr. Stefon: (walking around)
Me: Did you brush your hair, come on let’s go!!
Mr. Stefon: I can’t find the brush.
Me: It’s right there, come here and let me brush it real fast so we can get out of here (his tennis camp cries if your not there at 8, start threatening to kick your kids out).

I start brushing Mr. Stefon hair and it normally lays down, but um, I just can’t get it to all move in the same direction.

Me: Um, what is wrong with your hair?
Mr. Stefon: Huh
Me: (BELLS ARE SOUNDING THE FUCK OFF). What do you mean huh?
Me: WAIT. What happened to your damn hair? Did you cut your hair?
Mr. S: No, some boy at school did.
Me: Oh hell no, see now I have to be late to work because I don’t have time for this.
Me: Why did he cut your hair?
Mr. S: Well we were playing and he just did it.
Me: Your trying to tell me that you LET someone cut your hair.
Me: (PISSED, mumbling all types of smack wait until I get there, all that).
Mr. S: Yeah, well we were playing and he did it.
Me: (Mother intuition rings again, something is not quite right.) Stefon, did you cut your hair?
Mr. S: Huh
Me: You heard me!!! Your father would have noticed your hair and so would I! I don’t remember you looking crazy yesterday.
Mr. S: (lower his head)
Me: DID YOU CUT YOUR HAIR!!! Don’t have me go up to your school ready to give some kid a beat down and you did this to your self!
Mr. S: Yes, I did it.
Me: WHY?????
Mr. S: looking at the damn floor.
Me: I know you heard me, why? You better answer or I will hurt you!!!
Mr. S: I WAS BORED!!
Me: (GTFO) You mean to tell me, you were so bored, you decided to cut your own hair.

HOLD UP PEOPLE, what really makes this bad. Mr. Stefon has a curfew, even in the summer time, during the school year, he has to be in bed by 8 (thank God), and the summer 10. He came to me and asked could he stay up and watch a show, I said sure you have been good and we have been leaving the house on time so fine. His father said please don’t let that boy stay up, you know he gets in to stuff. BUT , NAW I overrided dad and said, look he has been good, no crazy shit, so let him chill. Well folks THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED!!

Me: TAKE THAT DAMN HOODIE OFF!! You will go to school just like that. You will not get a hair cut. Your ass looks like you have ringworms!!! For the life of me, I don’t understand why you would do this!! You need to come up with something better than you were bored, I swear for God!
Mr. S: Well, you all have me surrounded with all those bad kids. (Yes, he said it)
Me:
Excuse me? What bad kids?
Mr. S: The kids at the camp, they always do bad stuff (lie, they would kick them out)
Me: Um, I probably would believe you, if you cut your hair at camp with them, but no you did it at home, by yourself. They were no where around!! (full of it).

We did not get that boy hair cut for a long ass time (both his grandparents was pissed at us and some family members but who cares), he walked around looking like he had ringworms and his beautiful sister, Anger Mgmt gave him the lovely nickname of Patches O’hoolihan. Isn’t she lovely. I thought I would have to give her some oxygen she was laughing so hard. College boy, was really concerned with the boy mental status - mommy, why does he do stuff like that, that boy is scary.

Ya THINK!!

I know what you all will say, maybe he is doing it for attention and all of that. Well, yeah I would say the same except he gets ALL of the damn attention.

See ladies, I have plenty stories to tell.... like the time he climbed up the wall like Spi.der.man, or jumped off of a very high place when he was with his grandma and she was scared he died and didn’t know how to tell us (Anger mgmt tells this story laughing so hard she is crying). Oh wait , did I tell you he is not allowed to plug anything up because he electrocuted himself 2 times or maybe 3, I lost count.

And you know I got some pictures! I took them while we were walking to camp, he said, why are you taking them pictures......are you going to put them online......yes, sir. He is still my baby, and we can all laugh about it now, but then.....




By the way a tool of choice is a pair of KNITTING SCISSORS!! Ain't that some shit, the boy used my sharp ass knitting scissors.

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Mr. Stefon and his letter to me

Mr. Stefon, Mr. Stefon. I do not know what to do with him. I love that boy dearly and he expresses his feelings like me (and my mother) through writing. Some times when I get on him he will write me a letter saying he is sorry and he loves me. WELL. Here is the new one.

Background: The kids have been in school for more than a month. He wears a uniform and he just cannot get it together. He will forget his belt, deodorant, brush his hair, something. So I snapped.

Me: (Standing at the bus stop) Why is your pants looking like that? Where is your belt?
Mr. Stefon: I don’t know
Me: Your punished for two days, no t.v., I am sick of talking to you about that. You have to do better.
Me: (Getting off the bus) I can see your drawers, you have on blue undies with black writing.
Mr. Stefon: mumbled something, I didn’t quite catch it.
Me: I’m serious, don’t let me find out you were watching t.v. while I was at school. I want your homework on the table so I can check it when I get in.
Mr. Stefon: I know (I hate when he says that), it will be on the table.
Me: Have a good day
Mr. Stefon: Rolled his little eyes and didn’t say nothing to his lovely momma.

So, I get home after taking my mid-term which I was studying until 2 in the damn morning – so, of course my mind was fried.

I grab a damn Corona (yes damn it! I earned it….I think) and head over to the table to look at his homework.

Well, I see this essay or something and I begin to read it and it was about not having T.V. privilege. I showed the husband and he said – Don’t fall for the banana in the tail pipe! Whatever!!!

Here is the letter with the title, No TV for 2 days!

I think I should have privilege to watch t.v. because I respect my elders at school for 4 hrs. I love school, as much as video games, comics, water, and fruit. For a couple of times I just want a privilege to do everything in my house. Most of the time barely not in trouble at home and on the bus. If I have no TV I’ll feel like I’m trapped or slaved. I know television is not good for my but at least a privilege.

Before, I dissect this letter, I will give Mr. Stefon some props for taking the initiative to write me a letter stating his feelings. Gotta love him.

First - the boy is in school for more than 4 hours, so what does he do the other 4hours, curse at them, not listen?
Second – he does not like school more than no damn video game and comics or water and fruit, if he said vegetables, than yeah.
Third – I did not know it was his house, his lease is almost up.
Fourth – Did he say barely not in trouble @ home???? I have a post I so need to write. I am pretty sure Anger Mgmt will not agree about the bus, she is always complaining about picking him up.
Fifth – Did he say slaved?
Sixth – My biggest problem………Did he mention the belt? What he will try and do in the future? Something for me to release him from punishment?

This is too funny, I will be holding on to this letter like the rest to show his bad ass kids, when he try and chastise them for the wrongs I KNOW their ass will be doing. Oh and by this letter, was his birthday list that amounts to $1,000 of dollars. Boy please.

This morning

Mr. Stefon: Did you look at my homework?
Me: Nope (he just want to know if I saw his letter)
Mr. Stefon: I thought you said you was going to look at my work.
Me: I was sweetie but mommy was tired, where is it?
MS: He give me the work and try to quickly pass me the letter.
Me: Is this your homework?
MS: No, just read it, I wrote it for you.
Me: I said, oh well I will read it later.

I know your saying, why you just ain’t tell that boy you read it. Well, I didn’t because that boy is spoiled!! I always sell wolf tickets (as my husband say) and tell them damn kids they will be on punishment and never follow through, well got dang it, he is serving his two days and I will respond to his letter. It is never a dull moment with that boy, I guess God saw fit to break up the boredom with the oldest two.

Thursday, October 02, 2008

MAVERICK

If I hear that damn word one more 'gin. I will go CRAZY!!!!!! Yes, I am tired of Change as well - since John shaky ass has been saying it too, but that damn MAVERICK word is just messing with me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UNCLE!!!

Life broke opened a can of major whip ass and my name is the first on the list.

What it do yarny folks? Man, oh man, I miss you gals (guys?). Here’s what your friendly neighborhood blogger been up to:

Stress – I actually been holding it at bay by exercising. Yes got damn it, you read that right. I started exercising in the middle of August BEFORE school started. I figured I would be stressed out and did not want the people around me to think I was a cold B-I-T-C-H, so I started Tae Bo (again, for the three millionth time) and I like the original VHS one better, and I use my DVD one for weights (2 lb weights are a killer). I am not going to lie, a sistah was in straight pain the first week, but now I look forward to it. Especially since, I get to drop kick professors, classmates, husbands and coworkers (of course while tae boing an imagination is a beautiful thing). I have lost something, but I do not know what (I do not get on a scale – too negative for me). However, I have been able to fit in jeans I have not worn in 5 years and some dress pants I bought 3 years ago and never wore.

School - started for everyone in the house. I am love/hating it because I do not like slow people. If you are medically diagnosed with a disease then fine. Nevertheless, I swear people just do not think and guess who is on their team. Yup that would be me. I am an excellent team player, however, I DESPISE being on a team. I have asked the Lord to work with me in this area, because I am slam calling these educated people stupid. DAYHUM. More on their stupidity later.

Oh and bragging about my professor not giving us any exams in my Labor Relations class went out the window. The department told him that he could not put a lot of pressure on folks. He had our papers valued at 50% of the grade; people failed his class before because they for whatever reason did not turn in a paper. UM, the Department needs to mind their own business!! These are grown ass folks in Grad school, they better man up and do their papers. So, he moved on and said it will be open book exam that we can take home. Sweet, I can study more in my other class. UM, wrong Urban. Why? This man came to us yesterday and said there will be no open book or take home because something happened. OMG, now I have to study very hard for his class, because I have been playing and giving all my attention to my other class (which I have a mid-term exam on Monday w/an ethical question). Killing me softly.

Knitting – I have my mojo, however, I just do not have time and it sucks monkey balls, because I really want to knit Ene so dang on bad. I hope that after studying this weekend I can pick it up next week. I will take a picture, I stopped on chart 3.

Family – So many bdays this month – Nephew – September 11th, Mommy – September 19th, Niece – September 24th, Husband – September 28 (and I threw him a big ass party! DRAMA) – separate post. Nephew tomorrow, and many more this month. Were all good I guess, Mr. Stefon is not feeling me in school and he told me so AGAIN this morning. OH – we painted the house!!! Finally, well that is another post and me and my mommy is talking again, and she might get that #1 spot back, but um, she is on a 1 year probation with me right now! One of my bestest friends in the whole wide world is fleeing the state and moving to N.C. I do not know what I am going to do without her she has been in my life for 20 years, but she has to do what she has to do - another post.

Work – I have learned to re-like my job. How? Well, I am trying to act like its’ a new job. My coworkers are not bad people, hell it is only a couple of us. It has been working, until today. I broke one rule. Blogging. I have not posted because I am trying not to blog at work, but I missed you all so much. I have been following you and will get better and get on the computer at home.

PEACE!!!!